“YOU SEE DIANA IN MEGHAN? WE SEE A CALCULATED IMITATION.” Lady Jane Fellowes reportedly shut down Harry’s claims that “Meghan is just like Diana” — and the Spencer family wasn’t convinced for a second.

Tom Bower reveals Harry believed his mother would have been “beyond thrilled” and that the Spencers would instantly recognize Diana in Meghan. He even insisted Meghan would heal the family’s long-standing grief. But behind palace doors, the reaction was very different. Insiders claim the Spencers saw past the polished image — viewing Meghan as someone attempting to mirror Diana’s warmth while constantly seeking validation.
And when Charles Spencer allegedly realized Harry was prepared to give up everything for Meghan, the family is said to have made a quiet decision: protect Diana’s son at all costs — even if that means preparing an exit for the day he finally opens his eyes.
For Prince Harry, the absence of his mother, Princess Diana, has shaped nearly every milestone of his adult life. One of the most poignant examples came in 2017, when Harry brought his then-girlfriend Meghan Markle to meet Diana’s siblings — Lady Sarah McCorquodale, Lady Jane Fellowes, and Charles Spencer. It was, in many ways, the closest thing he could arrange to a mother’s blessing.

Harry had long carried the hope that his mother’s family would immediately see what he saw: a strong, compassionate woman who reminded him of Diana. In interviews, he spoke openly of believing his mother would have been “over the moon” about Meghan and said the similarities between the two women felt unmistakable to him.
Yet according to royal biographer Tom Bower, the meeting did not unfold as Harry had imagined. In his book Revenge, Bower claims that Harry expected Diana’s siblings — who knew her better than anyone — to see echoes of their sister in Meghan. Instead, he writes, “No one agreed that his vulnerable mother had anything in common with his girlfriend.” According to Bower, the family expressed doubts about whether Meghan would fit comfortably within the Royal Family’s highly structured, tradition-bound environment.
It was not the sisters but their brother, Charles Spencer, who reportedly chose to voice the concern directly. Having experienced the consequences of rushed relationships himself, he advised his nephew not to marry too quickly. Bower writes that Harry reacted bitterly, later admitting that integrating Meghan into his family had been “really hard.”

Despite the hesitation from Diana’s siblings, Harry remained steadfast. In their engagement interview and later in the Netflix docuseries Harry & Meghan, he described Meghan as sharing his mother’s empathy, warmth, and courage, saying, “So much of what Meghan is and how she is, is so similar to my mum.”
Still, Diana’s siblings have maintained a careful, steady presence in Harry’s life — one rooted in loyalty to their sister rather than agreement with all his decisions. They attended both princes’ weddings, supported Harry through legal battles, and regularly appeared alongside him during key anniversaries of Diana’s death. Lady Jane was even among the first visitors to meet baby Archie in 2019, arriving days before several senior royals.

But behind this consistent show of family unity, there have long been rumors — never confirmed — suggesting that the Spencer family quietly took steps to protect Harry in case his personal life veered into emotional or financial instability.
According to some unnamed sources cited in royal commentary circles, the family may have “set aside a contingency fund” or an “emergency provision” meant to safeguard Harry should he ever face the kind of crisis Diana herself once feared for her sons.
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These claims remain unverified, and no member of the Spencer family has commented publicly on them. However, royal observers frequently note that the Spencers have always viewed Harry and William not just as nephews, but as extensions of Diana herself — the last living legacy she left behind. Whether such a fund exists or not, the idea aligns with the image of a protective family determined to uphold Diana’s memory by looking after her sons.
What is undeniable is the steadfast bond between Harry and the Spencers. Even as tensions rose within the Royal Family, the Spencer siblings continued to support Harry quietly but visibly. In 2021, at the unveiling of Diana’s statue at Kensington Palace, they stood beside both brothers, unified despite the feud between William and Harry.

In recent years, Harry has spent time at Althorp, Diana’s ancestral home, often staying there during private visits to the UK. Last year, he attended the funeral of his uncle Robert Fellowes, walking into the somber event alone but emerging surrounded by family — Lady Sarah’s arm around him, Lady Jane whispering into his ear, Earl Spencer greeting him warmly.
The Spencers were also present at the Invictus Games’ 10th anniversary service in 2024, where Harry arrived without Meghan or his children. Inside the cathedral, the atmosphere softened visibly as Harry embraced his aunt and uncle and took his seat beside them — a reminder that, no matter how fractured other relationships became, Diana’s side of the family remained a constant refuge.
Throughout the decades since Diana’s death, her siblings have demonstrated unwavering loyalty to both William and Harry. They were by Diana’s side in Paris in 1997 and brought her home. They have stood behind her sons in triumph and tragedy. And they have guarded her memory fiercely.
Whether or not they ever saw Meghan as echoing Diana is ultimately secondary to the truth that has defined their relationship with Harry: their commitment has always been to him — and to the legacy of their sister.
If quiet preparations have been made for his future, as some speculate, then it would simply reflect their final promise to Diana: to look after her boys, even when the world around them becomes unbearably complicated.
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