While the late Grand Dame shared many pearls of wisdom in her acting roles, her private muses were equally inspiring.

When British actress Dame Maggie Smith died on September 27 at the age of 89, it was like saying goodbye to a lifelong friend. A familiar face on both television and cinema screens for decades — as well as on stage during her impressive theater career — some of her roles seemed to embody all the qualities you’d love to see in a beloved grandmother.

However, off screen the actress valued a quiet life away from the limelight. And some of her own private reflections showed her to be a real woman of substance; a woman whose own life experiences gave an appreciation for what she’d had, and what she’d lost, over nearly nine decades. In fact much of what she said was as equally inspiring as the quips from her popular character, Dowager Countess Grantham in Downton Abbey.

Below are just some of her own words that remind us of some of the important things to hold on to, especially in trickier times:

Recognize our blessings. The actress was fully aware that her career was something to be grateful for, and was happy to share this:

I love it, I’m privileged to do it and I don’t know where I’d be without it.”

Speak up. It’s not always easy to express your opinion, especially if you find it difficult to face conflict:

Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.”

Stay humble. Considering how admired the actress was, she never developed an ego. Instead her self-deprecating manner showed how little she thought of her talent, and how there was still lots to learn:

I longed to be bright and most certainly never was. I was rather hopeless, I suspect.”

I’ve won two Oscars and I still don’t begin to understand film acting.”

Acknowledging grief. The actress was very vocal as to how painful her husband Beverley Cross’ unexpected death had been on her. Describing her own grieving process, Smith shared her pain, and her own reality of the grieving process.

I still miss him so much it’s ridiculous. People say it gets better but it doesn’t. It just gets different, that’s all. Even in my dream I kept saying to him, ‘You are dead. You can’t be here'”

Accept ageing. The two-times Academy Award winner also pointed out in jest how she frequently was given roles of women older than her years. She eschewed plastic surgery and opted to grow old gracefully. At 78 she shared an interview:

I’ve been playing old parts forever. I play 93 quite often. When you’ve done it more than once, you take the hint. I think it’s a great burden if you’re one of those fantastic stars who’ve always been beautiful, then I think it’s hard.”

And don’t forget to laugh! If there is a lasting lesson to learn from Smith, it has to be the importance of finding room for laughter, even when you’re in the depths of despair:

I tend to head for what’s amusing because a lot of things aren’t happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.”